Slimy Kids' Choice Awards

I know, you're all watching the Pitt game. It's 60-59 Pitt, with 5:41 to go.

I'm switching back and forth between March Madness and Slime Time: the Nickelodeon Kids' Choice Awards.

Let's see, among the winners: the Jonas Brothers (over the Pussycat Dolls, Linkin Park and Daughtry for best musical group) and "High School Musical 3" (over "Iron Man," "The Dark Knight" and "Bedtime Stories"). The "Twilight" series won, too, and Taylor Lautner came to accept the award, saying the filming of "New Moon" was under way.

Pitt's up by 4, with 3:19 to go -- uh-oh, Villanova pulls within 1, and they're perfect from the line tonight.

Hugh Jackman and Sandra Bullock got slimed, big time, and Leonard DiCaprio got to be dignified when he was honored with the first Big Green Help Award for his environmental work. Will Ferrell is sliding down a slime slide for a "world record." Some crazy person bungy-jumped into slime, too -- saw that on the Nic Web site. Ack.

Chris Pine, the new Capt. Kirk, is tall! Or America Ferrara is short. They're presenting together.

The Rock -- OK, Dwayne Johnson -- has been an amiable host. Interesting to see the former wrestler become a star of family fare like "The Game Plan" and "Race to Witch Mountain." After his great turn on "Saturday Night Live" recently, I hope he does some more adult comedy work soon.

Villanova takes the lead with a minute-plus to go, and Pitt misse and travels. What's up with that?

Dwayne Johnson is forced to put on an orange dress (like one worn by Miley Cyrus) in an online vote. Come on, is that really what kids want to see? 

Villanova still hitting free throws with 45 secs to go; 73-69 'Cats. Oh, but a 3-pointer from Sam Young. 73-72. Commercial.

Favorite reality show is: "American Idol." Paula Abdul is there with David Archuleta. What's she wearing? Crowning of burp champ coming up ...

Wanamaker fouls and fouls out.

... I missed the best burper. Well, it was an animated competition this year. ...

Villanova by 4 with 20 secs to go. Now by 2 with 10.6 seconds to go.

Pitt falls,  but not before Levance Fields loooooooooong shot has a chance to win it at the buzzer. Sigh.

Now Dwayne Johnson is wearing a skirt (just a skirt) and chanting "slime" in some sort of tribal dance. Weird. And that summons the Jonas Brothers to get slimed.

Somehow, with Pitt losing, I can't get excited by lots of celebs covered in green goop.

Tabloid rumor catches fire; denial lost in the shuffle

You want juicy, unsubstantiated gossip? Google "Natalie Portman" and "Sean Penn."

A Star tabloid story has linked the two actors, said they were seen making out and "constantly touching each other" over dinner. The story has been picked up by a gazillion other Web sites -- married Oscar-winner Penn, 48, hooking up with the much younger Princess Amidala, 27-year-old Portman? Irresistible, it seems. E! Network's "The Soup" has already parodied the "couple," asking "Is Natalie Portman Too Old for Sean Penn?"

Only a very few sites had a different story: Kat Giantis writes that Portman's rep says it ain't so: "We flatly deny the story, other than the fact that she joined Sean and several others briefly during their dinner," states the spokesperson. "The rest of the story is patently untrue."

The New York Post said the dinner party included "Milk" screenwriter Dustin Lance Black and that Portman left with her pal, Rashida Jones, for the "I Love You, Man" premiere. The Chicago Sun-Times, meanwhile, has linked Portman to another actor, Ryan Gosling.

I'll be interested to see if this is a tabloid apology or "gotcha" when all is said and done.

Evidently, no one has had the nerve to ask the hot-tempered Mr. Penn if there's any truth to the rumor. He might have a stronger reaction than a denial, and really, in this case, who could blame him?

3-D is here, but is it here to stay?

Saturday morning started off with a bang and a smile -- and, perhaps, a look at the future of movie-going.

A 3-D preview of "Monsters Vs. Aliens" reminded me that when I interviewed Jeffrey Katzenberg before the Super Bowl, when a 3-D commercial of the movie was about to air, he told me I would be blown away by the InTru 3-D on the big screen. The DreamWorks animation chief has been preaching the gospel of 3-D for a while now, and I can't help but thinking that, like every other technology, this will be very different in a relatively short time. Or it will just go away, as it has over the years.

"M. Vs. A." does look great and, like "Coraline," the 3-D isn't in-your-face annoying but integrated seamlessly. (It also has impressive voice work from Reese Witherspoon, Hugh Laurie, Seth Rogen, Keifer Sutherland, Will Arnett, Rainn Wilson and Stephen Colbert, among others, obviously having a really good time with their characters.)

An article in the Brit mag Total Film March issue talks about the new 3-D process that James Cameron is working with for his first movie since Titanic 12 years ago. Like Katzenberg, Cameron thinks 3-D is the future, and why wait?

"Avatar," the sci-fi war movie that's been in his head since 1995, is taking shape now. Working with first Microsoft, then Peter Jackson's WETA special-effects team, he has helped develop a new 3-D camera technology that throws out digital motion-capture or performance-capture filming with the bath water. It seems like only yesterday Robert Zemeckis was perfecting this "new" 3-D imagery for "Polar Express" and "Beowulf."

As Total Film explains it: "It allows Cameron to do someting no one has ever done: shoot in live 3-D. Not poke-you-eye-out 3-D, but a totally immersive environment. You don't see a screen. You see a window. . . . 'Avatar's' process merges a full live-action shoot (real actors, real locations like New York and Hawaii) with a photorealistic CG world (green screen in Los Angeles), populated by "synthespians" who convey emotion as authentic humans."

Cameron concludes, "I can say with absolute certainty that you'll see stuff you've never imagined."

The release of "Avatar," rumored to cost around $300 million (will Cameron ever do anything on a small scale again?), has been on hold while more and more theaters become 3-D and IMAX 3-D compatible. I had to go out to Showcase West, at least a half-hour drive, to see "Monsters Vs. Aliens." It costs thousands of dollars to retro-fit theaters for 3-D and the cost is passed on in higher ticket prices. 

The timing may prove to be toxic if the economy continues to nose-dive.

It happened to be a two-movie Saturday, with "Duplicity" the evening choice.

It's a timely corporate espionage story about CEO's who will do anything to one-up each other and spies -- Julia Roberts and Clive Owen -- who try to take advantage of their need and greed. Roberts works her chiseled cheek bones to charm and vex Owens, who likes her just the duplicitous way she is. When big cheese Tom Wilkinson is seen in a glass-walled office, it reminded me for all the world of the set of the board-room/assembly room on the new NBC drama "Kings," about an alternate-world America run like a corporation. Owen has had back-to-back films that seem spooky timely, with this and "The International," in which the banks were the bad guys. 

Was glad to hear he had signed on for "Sin City 2." Imdb.com says his character, Dwight, "In the dark bowels of Sin City, Dwight plans to have his vengeance against the woman who betrayed him, Ava Lord." That would be Rose McGowan.

Doesn't say anything about 3-D, but can you imagine?

'Today's' Word, by Stephen Colbert

So, here's the thing that bothers me. It's not necessarily what Stephen Colbert said on "Today" this morning. It's that you'd think the show would have learned its lesson after L'Affaire du Jane Fonda.

Or am I being overly sensitive? A party-pooping prude?

Oh, frak. Let's start from the beginning.

Stephen Colbert was making an appearance on the morning show to promote his role as the president in the animated "Monsters Vs. Aliens," a family movie from DreamWorks out March 27. But this being Colbert, leader of the Colbert Nation and "The Colbert Report" on Comedy Central, talk turned to politics and his most recent campaign, to get the NASA space module Node 3 named for him. Then Meredith Vieira engaged him on the subject of Twitter, for a report that was next up on the show.

Colbert said he was a participant, and used his own version of the past tense of "to tweet" (rhymes with squat). Vieira turned many shades of red then admitted, "I do that, too."

They went to commercial and came back with Colbert in the studio for the Twitter report by Jamie Gangel. I had to leave for work, but hadn't heard if they addressed his odd choice of word at any point.

You may recall that Jane Fonda, also speaking with Vieira, let slip an obscenity that begins with "c" on "Today" in a February appearance last year. It was in the context of her involvement with a staging of "The Vagina Monologues," but NBC News immediately issued an apology for letting the word slip through.

So my question about Stephen Colbert, master of word play who has a segment on his show called "The Word," was it intentional, to see what he could get away with? Did he wonder, as I had, if "Today" had a delay to get rid of such "slip-ups"? And am I hopelessly old-fashioned to be shocked to hear certain words on TV before 9 a.m.?

Probably some or all of the above.

CSI live and onstage in Greensburg

I have to admit, I don't know what to make of this.

Just got an e-mail about a theater show at The Palace Theatre, Greensburgh: "CSI: Live -- An Interactive Stage Production." Actors onstage interact with Gil Grissom -- actor William Petersen, who recently left the flagship CBS TV show -- to solve a mystery involving a Las Vegas magic show. The release say it's "a live feed" from the crime lab; we have to assume it's in time to the play, like the combo live and video Terminator show at Universal Orlando.

The other live component is audience members, who get to come up onstage (doesn't say how they're chosen) to become part of the CSI team as witnesses, suspects and CSI recruits. "Together they recreate the crime scene and analyze the results, using their superior logic and forensic know-how to uncover hidden details, collect evidence and solve the case. .. 'CSI:Live' is a thrilling 60-minute adventure with audience interaction, cool technology and thrilling special effects. "

I don't watch "CSI" shows much -- and that makes me an avid TV-watching oddity. "CSI" has been a No. 1 show for CBS for years and it's had to make the transition this year from Petersen to Laurence Fishburne, always a rough time for a show and its fans. Here's a dose of Grissom for those missing him, I guess.

In case you're mad about "CSI," here are the show details:

Two shows, 1 and 4 p.m., Sunday, April 19, at The Palace Theatre, Greensburg. Tickets: $18, $10 for students. 724-836-8000 or www.thepalacetheatre.org.

Reports say Richardson's condition dire

I woke to the morning TV shows featuring all manner of experts weighing in on what might be the reason for actress Natasha Richardson's "dire condition," including why she said she felt fine after falling on a beginner ski slope and symptoms didn't begin until an hour later.

Then this from People.com:

As Natasha Richardson remained in a New York hospital, her family and friends had all but given up hope that she'll recover from a severe head injury.

"There is no chance," a family friend told PEOPLE on Tuesday night. "It is a fact that her heart is beating but she is brain dead."

Her dire condition - doctors described it to those close to Richardson as "leakage of blood between the brain and skull," the friend says - has the actress's family coming to grips with potentially having to make an unthinkably difficult decision. "It's not official yet," says the friend, "but they basically will detach her." 

Looking for good news in updates on injured actress

Watching the wires for updates on Natasha Richardson's condition is excruciating, and one of those things about the job of monitoring the news that I dread. Arts & entertainment and pop culture are not supposed to be matters of life and death, you know?

Also, it's one thing to be working on a local story, in the midst of it as it happens. It's another to be watching as an armchair voyeur, which is what I feel like sometimes. It also happens whenever I look at my e-mail -- Comcast and AOL and other services are constantly moving "news" for anyone signing in.

Certain words are calls to action. The Associated Press wire often publishes ALERTS on its entertainment wire -- none more startling than the one that said "Actor Heath Ledger has died of an apparent accidental drug overdose" and none more bizarre than many that begin "Britney Spears . . ." 

Today has been a constant wave of updates on the condition of Natasha Richardson, Tony winner, movie actress, wife of Liam Neeson, sister of "Nip/Tuck's" Joely Richardson. Natasha was critically injured in a ski accident in Montreal, and the updates started rolling in.

The latest as of about five minutes ago is that she's to the United States. That's the third hospital in two days. She originally went to a Quebec hospital near the resort where she was injured, then to Montreal, and now she's heading ... somewhere in the U.S., while her husband has rushed from a movie set to be with her. They have two sons.

The rush to get details is morbidly fascinating to watch unfold. One news agency reports she hit her head on a beginners slope. Then a statement is released for a resort saying she didn't show signs of not feeling well until and hour after the accident. Then there's a report that she's been moved to Montreal, and now on to "the United States," while agencies scurry to find out where, and paparazzi mobilize, cameras at the ready.

A Google search of her name and "news" at 4:12 reads:

Natasha Richardson in Critical Condition After Skiing Accident

Nothing there about the flight to the U.S. AP's story says: “According to the family’s press agent, the lady has left Canada around 12:30 today,” said Michelle Simard of the Sacre-Coeur hospital in a recorded message. “We have no information on Ms. Richardson’s health condition, but the family should give more information by tomorrow.”

It's the 11th update today.

I can only hope that instead of news about where Ms. Richardson is, there's some good news about how she is coming soon.

Wizard mag conjures 'Super Obama'

Alex Ross, among the greatest comic book artists of my generation, put his spin on President Barak Obama, superhero, with the April cover of Wizard magazine's "Super Obama: Special Collector's Edition." Subtitled: "A Comic Fan Storms the White House," you might think it's all about the president's taste in comic books. But no. It's about other presidential cameos within plot lines, with Mr. Obama's appearance in the recent Amazing Spider-Man #583 as the touchstone.

Most noteworthy among the nine other examples was JFK's appearance helping Superman protect his secret identity by posing as Clark Kent in Action Comics #309 - the comic book came out a week after President Kennedy was assassinated, but it was too late to recall the books.
Wizard bills itself as source for "comics, entertainment and pop culture." Although print editions of comic books still sell - and just this past weekend, a rare copy of the first Action Comic featuring Superman brought in $317,200 at auction, sold to John Dolmayan, drummer for the rock band System of a Down - the Web is making waves, too.

The magazine notes that among the biggest annoucements at the recent New York Comic-Con was that Marvel's new "Spider-Woman," by Michael Bendis and Alex Maleev, is "the first-ever comic series envisioned, designed and built from the group up to simultaneously as both a printed and Digital Motion comic."

It'll begin streaming online at Marvel.com to coincide with the May release of the feature film "X-Men Origins: Wolverine."

The other notable story about comic books and the online nation is about a fan revolution of homemade trailers. "Where the previous trend in fandom was to make five- to ten-minute short films - think Sandy Collora's 2003 DC-meets-Predator mash-up, ‘Batman: Dead End' - budding marketing types are now using increasingly affordable effects software to forge seak previos of desired comic and game adaptations," whether or not they're really happening. As an example, it points to a trailer that supposedly shows Brad Pitt as Lion-O, Hugh Jackman as Tygra, Vin Diesel as Panthro and lots of "Farscape's" Gigi Edgley in a "Thundercats" movie. It's looks like a professionally made trailer for a real film, except that imdb.com lists "Thundercats" for 2010, but no cast, and the movie has been percolating since at least 2007.

Well, Mr. Obama has been called The Internet President, so hopefully he considers that he's in good company with comic books and the Web.

Living in the past through time travel

Blame it on the Brits. They've been obsessed with time travel well before "Doctor Who," at least since H.G. Wells took off for the past and future in "The Time Machine." That novel was first published in 1895. Arthur Conan Doyle also got his readers lost in time, in 1912's "The Lost World."

Today, in the here and now, when the going is tough, I feel like we're more into living in the past - or imagining the future -- than ever. And time travel is the way we're getting there.

It's even happening onstage here in Pittsburgh, where Pittsburgh Public Theater and CLO Cabaret are taking us back to the musical eras of Kander & Ebb musicals and Frank Sinatra, the American idol of his day. At City Theatre, the touching love story "Mary's Wedding" is told in a dreamscape of memory and imagination, where a young woman confronts her past in order to face her future.

Back to the Brits, who keep hurling us through time. The Time Lord "Doctor Who" has been hurling through in time and space in that silly police box TARDIS since the 1960s, TV viewers keep on making the journey with him.

BBC America's "Primeval" came around recently, with rifts into the age of dinosaurs that allow two-way movement between the now and way-back-when.

The network's latest, "Ashes to Ashes," is a spin-off of the original "Life on Mars," which turned the idea of time travel on its ear by presenting the case of a present-day cop Sam Tyler, who finds himself back in the 1970s and isn't sure if he's in a coma and imagining it all or if he's been transported back to the days of police brutality and male chauvinism, or what. Turns out, coma was the right answer. In the first episode of "Ashes to Ashes," when a police psychologist who has studied Sam's case is shot at and suddenly finds herself back in the ‘80s, with Sam's old gang, we learn the true nature of Sam's fate. And get to relive the disco era, too.

"Life on Mars" was transferred to American TV on ABC with a starry cast including Harvey Keitel and Michael Imperioli of "The Sopranos," but viewers haven't followed. I would have thought in rough modern times, nostalgia for that time and an appealing lead like Jason O'Mara would have been enough to attract a large audience, but I guess not. We'll find out the fate of the Sam who landed in 1970s New York, when the World Trade Center could be seen in a skyline shot in the premiere, in the season and series finale.

Next up, the BBC is going back to the future. The network is brining back "Survivors," not to be confused with the reality show "Survivor." It's about a handful of the folks who are left to fend on post-apocolyptic Earth after most of the population is wiped out by a virus.

Time travel would seem like a sure bet for TV series, which have moved back and forth in it so much it could give viewers a nose bleed - like those poor folks on "Lost," for whom a flash of light, a trip in time and a nose bleed spells doom. That ABC show uses time as a plot device in flashbacks and innovative flash-forwards, then moves an entire island around in time as well. I keep waiting for someone to scream, "Stop the world, I want to get off!"

With so much TV and so much time on its mind, a top 10 list seems in order. These are references purely from my past and present. I never watched, for instance, Showtime's "Odyssey 5," which was about the crew of ship sent back to the past to try to prevent Earth from exploding. So in no particular order, other than the time it takes to search my memory and bring these shows into the present tense:

1. "Time Tunnel" (1966-67) - James Darren and Robert Colbert are caught in a time-traveling experiment and are tossed from era to era, while Whit Bissell, who always seems to be in a white coat in a science fiction role, trying to bring them home.

2. "Quantum Leap" (1989-93) - In another failed experiment, Scott Bakula is transferred into the bodies of people from the past while wise-cracking Dean Stockwell appears as a hologram, helping to guide him through each situation.

3. "It's About Time" (1966) - Played for laughs and not in any way connected to "Planet of the Apes," astronauts land in prehistoric times. The Sherwood Schwartz comedy starred Frank Aletter and Pittsburgher Jack Mullaney, who land among cavefolks including Imogene Coca and Joe E. Ross. What I remember is the catchy theme: "It's about time, it's about space, about two men in the strangest place ..."

4. "Star Trek" (Episode 28, "The City on the Edge of Forever," 1967) - OK, this was one episode. But come on, how can you have a list about TV time travel that doesn't include Joan Collins playing a Florence Nightingale who actually melts Capt. Kirk's heart. He has to then watch her die in car accident because, as everyone knows, you can't change events from the past without dire consequences ever after.

5. "Buck Rogers in the 25th Century" (1979-81) - In this version of the space hero, Buck is played by Gil Gerard as a NASA pilot who is accidentally frozen for 500 years and winds up in the future. Glen A. Larson created the series and used props from his previous show, the original "Battlestar Gallactica."

6. "Heroes" (now) - One of my least favorite story lines on the show was Hiro going back in time to feudal Japan to figure out his connection to the hero of a story his father used to tell him. Come to think of it, one of the things I miss most about "Heroes" is Hiro (Masi Oka) using his power to move around in time and space - without getting stuck there for long periods of time - as he searches for his destiny.

7. "Lost" (now) - And now that we know that the island can move through time with the turn of a wheel, and we've glimpsed a giant statue in the past, will we ever learn the origin of the giant four-toed stone foot ...

8. "Sliders" (1995-2000) - This was actually wormhole travel, a la "Doctor Who," the "Stargate" series and "Farscape." The show started out exploring what ifs, such as, what would have happened if penicillin had not been invented, if America had been conquered by the Soviet Union or if women held all the power.

9. "Life on Mars" (BBC, 2006-07) / "Life on Mars" (ABC, now) - Two entertaining, well-acted and complex series that landed someone from the present in the past and asked him to solve the mystery of how he got there.

10. "Doctor Who" (then and now) - There's a reason the Doctor keeps coming back. He'd be the perfect imperfect superhero for the Marvel comic book universe: An alien who is the last of his kind, troubled because of atrocities he's seen and felt compelled to commit, and just trying to find companionship and the right path in his ever-changing galaxy. That he chooses to find his companions among humankind works out well for all of us Earthlings.

Would love to hear your time travel faves -let me know in the comment space below.

Survey of Boston teens finds many hold Rihanna responsible for beating

Let's hope it's just the kids in Boston, but I'm afraid that's too much to ask.

An informal poll of 200 Boston teenagers found that nearly half said pop star Rihanna was responsible for the beating she allegedly took at the hands of her boyfriend, Chris Brown. Of those questioned, ages 12 to 19, 71 percent said that arguing was a normal part of a relationship; 44 percent said fighting was a routine occurrence.

Talk about a sad commentary on how these kids are growing up.

The charismatic Brown, 19, and his girlfriend, 21-year-old Rihanna, are high-profile pop stars, both with a string of endorsements, who would seem to have reconciled since Feb. 8. On that night, which should have been a celebration of their talent at the Grammy Awards, an argument during a car ride ended in a battered Rihanna calling police for help and Brown ;ater charged with assault. Though they appear to be back together and are reportedly recording a new duet together, Brown has found his music dropped from many radio stations and Doublemint dropped him from its ad campaign.

Even Oprah called him out and called out to Rihanna, too, warning if a man hits once, he's bound to do it again, and pleading with them both to get help. The Queen of TV even conducted a live show yesterday about domestic violence.

The message apparently isn't getting through. Any boy or girl who things he or she deserves blame if someone else hits them obviously needs help on a much deeper level than tabloids, TV shows or bloggers can provide.

The Boston Globe wrote that the results of the survey, conducted by the Boston Public Health Commission across the city and equally among boys and girls, are startling for local health workers who see a generation of youths who seem to have grown accustomed, even insensitive, to domestic violence.

"I think you'd have to be pretty jaded if you weren't startled by it," said Casey Corcoran, director of the health commission's new Start Strong program.

The program began in the fall as part of a Start Strong: Building Healthy Teen Relationships Initiative, a private foundation program that was offered in 11 cities across the country. Corcoran said the four-year, $1 million competitive grant program will allow the city to train mentors and outreach workers to speak to 11- to 14-year-olds about the dangers of domestic violence.

Oprah Winfrey's show Thursday on teen dating violence featured the Start Strong initiative.

"This is an opportunity to start those conversations; it shouldn't end with a survey," Corcoran said.

The Brown-Rihanna incident has been pointed to by advocate groups for domestic violence victims as an example of the challenges victims face in confronting domestic violence, especially because she has chosen to continue her relationship with her attacker.

What the survey indicates is a lot of kids have that in common with Rihanna. Let's hope that they all have something else in common -- getting help in escaping the cycle of violence. And soon.